How can Parents Handle Cyber-Bullying

If a teen becomes withdrawn or seems tense or depressed without apparent reason, parents should consider cyber or text bullying as a possible cause. Teens are often reluctant to talk about bullying and if necessary, parents may need to check the history on their son or daughter's phone and computer.

Once it is confirmed that cyber or text bullying is taking place, suggest the teen to do the following and help them with it if necessary:

• Don't reply to bullying text messages but save them onto the phone for future use as evidence if required
• Change cellphone numbers and be careful over who is given the new number
• Take screen shots of offensive messages on social networking sites and send them to the website's administration
• Report the messages to the police and school if they are threatening in any way
• Encourage the teen to talk about their feelings and fears and seek professional counselling for them if you feel it is needed

Emotions Associated with Cyber-Bullying

Cyber-bullying is conducted through the medium of texts, emails, online messages and comments. The content of these messages is such that it provokes an emotional reaction in the one being targeted. The emotions may include the following:

• Rejection
• Hurt
• Sorrow
• Fear
• Anger
• Frustration
• Shame

In many cases the victim experiences a mixture of feelings that leaves them confused and unsure of what to do or who to go to for help. Click here for a closer look at the emotional impact of cyber-bullying and how to handle it.

Six Types of Cyber-Bullies

Cyber-bullies come in many shapes and sizes but often fit into one of the following categories:

• Nitpickers
• Verbal abusers
• Those that drag up the past
• Stalkers that follow everything you do online
• Persistent bullies who are convinced they are right
• Cyber-bullies who consider themselves experts

All of the above behaviours are destructive and can cause immense pain to their victims. Click here for more information on these types of bullies.

Confronting a Cyber-Bully

Confrontation is an important part of stopping the cycle of cyber-bullying. This is obviously easier when the bully is known to the victim. There are three typical reactions when confontation takes place:

Denial

Retaliation

Victimhood

To find out more about these and how to effectively confront a cyber-bully, click here.

Why Cyber-Bullying is Never Alright

Cyber-bullying exists on a spectrum ranging from mild to extreme. Many people try and shrug it off, not wanting to make a big deal of it. In reality, cyber-bullying is a big deal and should never be tolerated in any form. Here are some links to articles on cyber-bullying that may prove helpful:

Cyber-Bullying and the Law

How Cyber-Bullies Respond to Confrontation

Six Types of Cyber-Bullies

The Emotional Impact of Cyber-Bullying

Understanding Cyberstalking and Bullying

Update on Cyber-Bullying is Never Alright

Cyber-Bullying is Never Alright is reaching its target audience. Orders have been sent to schools and libraries around New Zealand, and print and Kindle copies have sold through Amazon.com.

Aimed at teenagers but suitable for any age group, the book gives examples of cyber-bullying as well as practical advice on how to handle the problem. As people become more and more connected in cyberspace, it is essential to be prepared for this type of attack. While it is common to hide the abuse and feel ashamed and humiliated, it is never alright to be bullied. This book will help you to work out a plan of action and pursue it.

Cyber-Bullies are Cowards

Bullies are cowards and cyber-bullies even more so. They hide behind technology, screens, cell phones and fake profiles. Because they don't see the immediate reaction to their cruel words, they say things they would be unlikely to say face to face. Click here to read more about cyber-cowards and the best way to handle them.